When I was younger, there used to be people I used to look up to, admire and endlessly compare myself to. These people used to be friends, some adults around me, or perhaps even my own extended family. They seemed to have something special about them, you know? Something that put them on the right… Continue reading Fake pedestals
Tag: friendship
Just getting things off my chest
Living abroad is a whole different kind of challenge that I have never experienced before. I usually try not to think about the difficulties but it's been getting to me lately. My friendships feel superficial, I don't understand the language, and going to the grocery store is an anxiety-provoking activity. I have never, ever felt… Continue reading Just getting things off my chest
Night silence
You know, living alone, it's the nights that are the quietest. Past 8:00 PM, when nearly everybody from my old life is asleep and everybody from my new life seemingly has plans. I unlock my phone and there's no messages. I open someone's chat and hope to see them online. But they're not. Or, they… Continue reading Night silence
Loneliness
As I grow older, there's this pervasive sense of loneliness that grows within me. It was a small blot as a child, barely noticeable but as I enter adulthood, it's been growing and growing and growing. And I see no way of stopping it. I crave real relationships, deeper relationships. I crave a shoulder to… Continue reading Loneliness
I don’t deserve a good friend
There's some things about myself that I just haven't been able to put into words so far. But I'm going to try right now. Hopefully I can unpack this enough to help myself start working on it. I do my best to be a positive influence on others' lives. I try to help them in… Continue reading I don’t deserve a good friend
17 days
So, I'm leaving in about 17 days. Moving to another country, leaving this life behind and starting a new one. It's a period of many changes, ends and beginnings. I'm leaving. It doesn't get anymore real than that. Well, I've been spending my last few days home with my friends, a little bit with my… Continue reading 17 days
Love
Love, the big word. Daunting, fulfilling and wholesome. I've been wondering, what does 'love' mean to me? My idea of this concept has changed over the years, and will continue to change through the years. Only, I think I want to document what it means to me right now at 4:16 PM, 11th April, 2020,… Continue reading Love
Memoirs of a Muse 