I had somewhat of a mini-breakthrough today. For months, I've been subconsciously afraid of leaving the country, living on my own and stepping into the full-blown adult life. It's a fear I've been trying to ignore, or minimise, yet it's nearly always at the back of my mind. I mean, it's going to be my… Continue reading Independence
A COVID Death
My mum and I were just having a conversation. She told me that when someone dies of old age, it's easier to accept. As much as you have loved them, the fact that they were so old makes it a little easier to accept. Yet, when someone passes away before their time due to a… Continue reading A COVID Death
Fear of COVID 19
This pandemic has shaken a lot of us up, myself included. Like everyone else, I have never experienced anything like this in my entire life. This is unchartered territory for me. I have never been advised to stay home for as long as we have, I have never gone so long without seeing my friends… Continue reading Fear of COVID 19
Waiting for the next ‘big thing’
Lately, it feels like my days are just 'fillers' until I go away to college. Everyday feels the same: I wake up, do my morning chores, sit in front of my laptop and just stare. Nothing feels like it has any value anymore. I think the pandemic plays a part in it, of course. But… Continue reading Waiting for the next ‘big thing’
Sacrificing for love
We were having a discussion about love, relationships and marriage in my Positive Psychology class today. I didn't listen to the entire class, but when I tuned in, my professor was speaking about sacrifice. Sacrifice for love. Some of my fellow students expressed that they didn't believe love is enough for a relationship or marriage,… Continue reading Sacrificing for love
Not reading lately
I haven't been reading lately and it's gnawing at me. I was someone who used to be glued to a book as a child, even as a teenager. But the past few months, I feel like this part of me has been slipping away. I keep making excuses not to read; telling myself I'm too… Continue reading Not reading lately
Some things are ‘just for me’
Do you have a few things you keep to yourself? Objects, thoughts or emotions. They're yours and no one else's, you rarely talk about them because sharing them is tainting them. I have some things like this and I know for certain that others in my life do too. People who are not private, become… Continue reading Some things are ‘just for me’
‘Different’
I went out for lunch with some school friends today. The last time that I met them was years ago, the last time we had a conversation that lasted more than two minutes was months ago. I've never been one to maintain friendships that have run their course; most times, I stop making an effort… Continue reading ‘Different’
My grandfather’s advice
I just got off the phone with my grandfather. He's a stern and methodical man, he always has been. I've admired him for his need for order, love of lists, habit of writing things down and undying curiosity. I share these characteristics too and I truly believe that these things have rubbed off on me,… Continue reading My grandfather’s advice
Budget plans
Last evening, my dad and I spent hours making a budget plan for my study abroad. It's not that I've been accepted anyplace yet, but it was a requirement for someplace I'm applying to. At first, it was okay. I kept thinking, oh, we can afford this, it's not that big a deal. But then,… Continue reading Budget plans
Memoirs of a Muse 