Lately, I've been making a genuine effort to identify my patterns as a first step to changing the harmful ones. I've been trying to observe when I shut down, when I get annoyed, irked, or frustrated. I'm trying to understand why I react to things a certain way, and I've been trying to be cognizant… Continue reading Identifying my patterns
Tag: growth
I can change my mind
One of the most exciting discoveries I've made in the past year is that I can change my mind. It sounds really basic, I know. But this discovery was fundamental for me. It's been a revelation. I can change my mind, how cool is that? How cool is it to have independence, autonomy, and the… Continue reading I can change my mind
I almost reached out to my ex today
I almost reached out to my ex today. I was going through some of my old stuff and found a portrait of me that he had drawn. That, and its accompanying letter, made me nostalgic for a time that has passed. I found myself thinking about him—wondering what he's been up to these past years… Continue reading I almost reached out to my ex today
My life is so beautiful
My life has been so beautiful so far. I have had the most wonderful experiences. I have travelled (albeit not nearly as much as I would like), I have had a loving and supportive family, I have built the warmest and closest friendships, and I have loved and been loved by so many people. I… Continue reading My life is so beautiful
Defining moments
I never mention people by name on my blog, but I think this time I'll make an exception. I was just listening to some voice notes my friend Vishnu sent me about his acting and shadow work. He was talking about how his dive into theatre has been deeply entwined with his spiritual journey and… Continue reading Defining moments
Feeling dissociated
Trigger warning: self-harm I feel like I've talked about this time and time again on my blog, but, for me, talking about this never seems to get old. And my blog is the space I use to explore such thoughts in an unadulterated manner. So, here I am. I used to self-harm as a teenager.… Continue reading Feeling dissociated
Rejection
Rejection is not pretty. I don't like it, and I don't imagine that anyone else does either. To me, rejection feels a lot like failure. And I don't like failing. I think my whole life, whether it is personal or academic, revolves around me doing things that minimise my chance of failure. I do not… Continue reading Rejection
The world killed the poet in me
I think the world has killed the poet in me. Or rather, the world has killed the poetry in me. As I grow older, I find myself becoming more practical, sensible, and logic-driven than I was as a child. As a child, I had my head up in the clouds, I loved poetry, I had… Continue reading The world killed the poet in me
My Parisian fairytale
So, I was in Paris for about a week. Five days to be exact. The trip was absolutely magical. Genuinely, it was ethereal. I fell in awe of the city, the people and the atmosphere. I like big cities, I grew up in one. Paris felt like being transported back to India in the confines… Continue reading My Parisian fairytale
A shift in the cosmos
Last night, I was on my rooftop with a friend. We were walking, talking and watching the clouds change shape. When I'm with him, there's no masks on. I don't feel the need to behave a certain way or say certain things, I'm just me. Authentic, real me. I'm honest with him, more honest than… Continue reading A shift in the cosmos
Memoirs of a Muse 