I’m making new friends in Leiden, it’s so exciting. And I mean friends. Not people I say “hi” or “bye” to on the stairs in our building. Not acquaintances. Friends.
Friends who fit into different parts of my life. Friends with whom I do different types of things. It’s so cool, this realisation that I don’t need a single friend to fulfil all my needs. I just need different friends to resonate with various parts of myself that are important to me. I have a friend with whom I can go to the gym and go Kringloop hopping. I have a friend I can go climbing with. I have a friend I can go on walks with. I have a friend I can be super snarky with. I have a friend I can have nice dinners with.
I had a lot going on when I first moved to Leiden, but I made it a priority to meet new people and spend time with them. It was exhausting at times, I felt like I was putting on a show. I was exchanging niceties, talking about the details with everyone, and asking the same questions. And for a few months, it felt as if I wasn’t making any progress. That we were all just acquaintances and not real friends. But it clicked a couple of weeks ago. It clicked when I was at brunch with a friend. Then it clicked again when I went climbing with a friend. Slowly, but surely, these people are wading their way from “acquaintance territory” to “friend territory”. And it’s all so exciting! I’m so excited to let new people into my life and have new adventures. I’m a little scared, but that’s natural.
What a privilege it is to be able to experience the fun that it is to make new friends.
20 February 2025.
Memoirs of a Muse 