Things that make me feel better

Sometimes, I make myself utterly anxious and terrified from the things I think about and things that happen around me.

But there are some things that make me feel so much better. While not all of these things work all of the times, I decided it was worth listing them down for a rainy day – whether it’s yours or mine.

1. Reading poetry

Poetry, to me, doesn’t have to be rhyming words and a verse. It’s absolutely anything. Quotes, the most unlikely words strung together and short couplets. I adore these. Reading these makes a feeling of pure joy erupt within me. And if not joy, they bring a movement of stillness within my being. Poetry forces me to stop, think, consider. It can make me sad sometimes, but this sadness resembles art because it helps me break out of my unhealthy cycles and grow in the best way I can.

2. Listening to the rain

This, of course, applies only if it has been raining. Nevertheless, the rain calms me. The sound of it beating against the roof of my ceiling, the smell of the mud, the cool temperatures. They’re all therapeutic. Listening to the rain is like meditation to me. It utterly grounds me; may it be while I reach an outstretched hand to touch it or simply sit in my balcony to enjoy it.

3. Writing – on my laptop or on paper

I used to write quite a bit when I was younger, a hobby I lost along the way. But only in the recent months have I rediscovered this passion of mine. When I’m feeling utterly overwhelmed and drained, if my heart is feeling up to it, I write. My writing at that moment could range anywhere from an unfiltered angry rant, to the recounting of a past memory, to writing poetry about the situation. Usually, I write on my laptop. I open my wordpad and type away until I feel physically, mentally and emotionally lighter. Only a couple of weeks ago I’ve discovered that I can feel this meditative state even when I write on a sheet of paper. So that’s what I’ve been doing, I’ve been copying down the poetry I’ve typed out into a notebook. Doing this forces me to read each and every word, understand it and then lay it on paper. It’s nice, at times. At times, it’s a little too much. But I’ve been trying to find a balance between those two.

4. Reading other people’s experiences

I love to read. Though I do enjoy a great novel from time to time, what I enjoy most are biographies, memoirs and the so-called ‘self-help’ books; simply because I’m someone who learns from experience – whether it’s my own or of those around me. I like to recount their experiences with them and live through some of their best days side by side. It’s empowering, knowing that so many people have grown through so much; surely I must be on the right track.

4. Drawing

This activity doesn’t always make me feel better because I’m a perfectionist who tries to get things as ‘right’ as possible. But sometimes, when I draw, I feel a stability that I absolutely enjoy. I’m not the kind of artist who colours and paints. Instead, I like to make my drawings bold and messy. Sometimes, I scribble more than I draw, but that’s okay because the amount of focus I put into it temporarily takes my mind off things that were bothering me in the first place.

5. Setting my phone aside

This one is actually one of my most recent discoveries. I haven’t done it too often yet, but I know that I’m going to feel ten times better when I commit and begin to do this on a regular basis. Basically, I feel like social media and entertainment media is all toxic if used extensively and irrelevantly. Maybe it’s hypocrisy, because I do enjoy scrolling through Instagram time to time and watching YouTube, but that’s just how I feel. And because I feel this way, I’ve decided to keep my phone aside whenever it gets too much for me. I’ll delete Instagram for a few days and unsubscribe from some YouTube channels. But this is something I’m going to try out from now on – as a heavy detox against a world that is constantly racing against time.

6. Fairy lights

Having my fairy lights on in my room, with some soft (or loud) music playing in the background has become my nirvana. I enjoy piano music. A lot of the times, it can have a major calming effect on me. So the next time I feel upset, I think I’m going to place my phone in another room, switch on fairy lights, play some music and lay on my bed. I’ll close my eyes and try to ground myself until I can find my balance again.

7. Dancing

I’m a trained dancer, but when I’m feeling low, all sense of grace and poise fly out of the window. I like to play the spunkiest music, let loose and dance my heart out when I’m feeling a little overwhelmed. The burst of energy, the sweat and the exertion make me feel truly alive in times that I feel like half a person.

That’s it for now, I guess. I’ll probably add on to this list as time goes on.

But sometimes, I need reminders that I can actually do things to make myself feel better rather than suffer in my anxious states. This post is exactly that. A reminder, from me to me.